Over the weekend I made some great personal triumphs (in my opinion) — I went for drinks and conversation with some ladies at one of said ladies’ homes, and we were all tipsy on bourbon and merry by the end of the night, although talking about extremely nerdy things like the OED and what our favorite publishing houses/imprints were. On Saturday I decided to make coq au vin, which I’d never done before, so to acquire ingredients Chris and I went to the farmers’ market and the (very) local butcher, and invited a friend over for dinner after the whole thing was said and done. Sunday meant a brunch date with someone I respect a great deal, and we had more nerdy book talk and self-gossip over eggs before returning to the Bug&Fish pad (aka Our Home) to laze about some more. I took some portraits with expired Polaroid film. She commented that I had “a lot of dresses.”
All of these things were social efforts, and I neither hated them nor exhausted myself doing them. In fact, I enjoyed them. Chris invited me to watch John Carter last night and I declined in favor of taking a bath and going to bed early. A friend and I have spent some amount of time recently talking about what it means to feel like one “must” be social in order to not be a “loser,” how at times it’s important to push oneself to be social, how it’s important to have alone time to recuperate, the role that being social plays in introversion or extroversion — she is an ambivert, and, if you’ve been reading this blog for any amount of time, you know that I’m an introvert, though not shy.
Part of my feelings about being social and introversion are tied to my experiences growing up as a zine kid and then as someone who spent a lot of her social time meeting people on the Internet, who then didn’t meet face-to-face with a lot of her friends till later, or only a few times a year (if that!). To me, being online is, to some degree, “being social.” It’s that extra step that gets me. The extra step of seeing people in person. I almost, for example, begged off on Friday in favor of lying on the couch and reading.
Are you an introvert or an extrovert — or maybe an ambivert (both)? Do you like going out and being social, and do you have self-imposed rules about how often you ought to show your face? Are there people in your lives who encourage you to be more social? Is it even a thing for people to be encouraged to be less social? I’d love to know.